As of writing this, I’ve been in the arts industry for over a decade. I began my career in art-making in 2011 while attending Wilson College (Chambersburg, PA). Last November, I stopped selling art to the public and now reserve my art for exhibiting and charity auctions. I used the proceeds from the last decade of my career sale to establish The Metzbower Foundation, a 501c3 charity that focuses on grantmaking in arts & culture, education, family investment, environment, and human rights. I hold one annual exhibition+installation and images of my work have been merchandised as home goods, accessories, and prints.
I want to share my story of how I first encountered sexism or gender disparity in the art industry when I decided to briefly experiment with using a male pseudonym.
I was early on in my career and was becoming aware of the alarming gap in art visibility, spaces, and price points based upon gender. I had already noticed, as a female artist who was also a mother, that males had more power over their art careers because they seemingly weren’t tied down as much as females to parenting duties. I noticed that my female colleagues with children traveled less than my male colleagues with children. Even one of our own leading female contemporary artists, Marina Abramović, made the declaration that good artists couldn’t be both artists and mothers- a direct hit to female artists everywhere. Perhaps, wanting to escape the social boundaries placed upon me as a female/female artist was the deeper meaning behind experimenting with a male pseudonym. I wanted to feel what it was like- even for just a moment- to be held to the same standards of art, parenting, and social obligations that a male was held to. Thus, the pseudonym was borne.
I changed nothing except the name. My work remained the unaltered.
And it sold. Fast. Frequently. I was unprepared for this. I honestly didn’t think anything would happen or that I would make any sales under this new, unknown, unverified pseudonym. If I had to estimate- I’d say I sold twice as much and for twice. Perhaps I should have taken into account the gender gap percentage in pricing and priced my work even higher.
I immediately halted the pseudonym experiment. It was gaining momentum and that scared me. I didn’t want to lose credit for my work to a pseudonym and I feared that I could permanently get stuck in this pseudonym if the momentum continued. In the world of technology- it’s quite easy to lose control after something goes viral. I knew pseudonyms were very common in the arts industry- especially writing. J.K. Rowling, the Brontë sisters, Louisa May Alcott, etc. This was a common loophole to get around being dismissed as a female artist or writer. But I witnessed firsthand the immediate acceptance and respect that a male name holds in society.
I did, however, feel uncomfortable with the notion that my work, my beloved work, was now in the hands of someone who would possible have chosen not to buy it, whether consciously or subconsciously, if they had been aware that it was made by a female. What is not commonly discussed with females using male pseudonyms is the reaction when the cat is let out of the bag. My fear was that my work would be mistreated, defaced, destroyed, or purposefully resold well under its value. I wasn’t taking that chance.
It was during this brief experiment that I learned something about myself as an artist: I want my art in the hands, homes, and private collections of people who value it and value me as an artist and I would settle for nothing less. I wanted to stand in my own body, representing myself- including all my female life experiences, to storytell from the perspective of me- a woman, and to be unapologetic about who I was and what gender I was.
Even if it meant I wouldn’t sell.
I abandoned the pseudonym and the notion that I could escape social constructs by hiding who I was. My confidence grew as an artist and as a woman. Since that experiment, I’ve continued to make art in a male-dominated field. Ten years and I have less than 300 following my Instagram account- but they’re following me not a pseudonym. I went on to obtain the highest degree in my field, a terminal dual degree Masters of Fine Arts in Visual Art & Choreography. And as a mother, I demonstrate to my children that you must be true to yourself and to never hide who you are. I still have a long journey ahead of me in the arts- but I’m walking that path as Beck Metzbower, an American female contemporary artist.